Wow, so my last post was over 3 months ago. I told myself that with this blog, this time around, I'd do better at actually putting something up consistently and I'm totally slacking... However I do have a few solid reasons. So much has gone down over the summer. Since June 1...
I think Dave and I both finally came to terms with expecting twin girls. At first we were super shocked and, well, pretty terrified thinking about having two newborns at the same time with a toddler at home. This also meant we needed bigger cars to fit three carseats, we should probably find that house in a quiet neighborhood before their arrival, and also that we were likely going to be on one income for a while so I could tend to not one, not two, but three under three. Then... the excitement set in! We were having twin girls and wow, our lives were about to get a whole lot more interesting and my heart just began to grow on its own. Then, we found out some iffy/scary news. We found out our (then) 18 week twinnies were being affected by TTTS in utero and that we were going to need treatment. Because without treatment, the likelihood of neither making it was close to 100%, and with it they both had a 65% chance of making it and an 85% chance at least one would survive. We had to take multiple trips down to Philadelphia Children’s Hospital for treatment. The morning after laser ablation surgery left us with only one of their hearts beating. Our "donor" baby passed away due to insufficient nutrition from the placenta; whatever she was getting prior to the surgery was likely coming as support from her connection to the other baby but with the surgery that connection was cut off. We found out that if she passed away before the surgery, our surviving baby would likely have brain damage because of the toxins passed through the vessels so it was a good thing the connection was severed. We also found out that our surviving baby's heart was under stress and that she had a couple leaky valves and extra fluid around her heart, which has since resolved itself and is no longer an issue. This was all was followed by 3.5 weeks of strict bedrest and “light activity” until birth. Our survivor twin is now doing great, kickin’ away, and we hope she is able to keep cookin’ til 38-40 weeks! Lessons I learned from this experience: Loss is never easy, but it’s doable.... Don’t EVER tell someone who is grieving that “everything happens for a reason” because that is just about the last thing she wants to hear. You may have also just become the last person she wants to talk to.... Also, I learned that you have to be grateful every damn day for what you do have and don’t let anything get in the way of that.
Since then, we’ve also had a second litter of kittens bless our household… SURPRISE! Our stray Snickers went right back at it, and call us distracted, but we were pretty much blindsided by it. We were all like, "Oh Snickers, you're getting pretty round..." "Oh, Snickers why are you so lazy these days??" "Snix, you better not be preggo again"... Sure enough, she rolled over one day to let me feel her belly and that's when I realized there absolutely were more kittens coming and soon. That was the day before she had them. 5 more beautiful kittens, 8 more weeks of having 7 cats (...and a dog, and a toddler, and a huge pregnant belly), and within this time about 3 solid weeks of Dave being the only one able to scoop 7 cats’ worth of litter. Silver lining? They are cute as can be, they all have homes lined up, and (!!) two pairs will be going home together!! That makes me super happy <3
More [super exciting] news… I FINALLY opened my Etsy shop! I honestly never thought that would be one of my things. Since the news of twins started to sink in, though, I’ve had to really think about how my photography business needed to evolve to allow for income through the first hectic months/years of their lives. Opening an Etsy Shop to sell my photographs was one of my ideas, and to be honest it was very daunting to me. I love to shoot; I really don’t love the act of selling my work. I know the value of my sessions = the value I put on spending time with my family, so that comes easily to me (adding in materials, my equipment value, insurance, post-processing, and all that other photography jazz.) But the idea of working on and selling my work to be hung in the homes of others is a bit scary for me! It’s like I’m entering into a different realm of art. Over the last couple years though I pledged to myself that I would print and hang more of my work throughout my home, and boy have I gotten good at that (sorry to Dave, who has been put to work hanging everything.) Since then I’ve had family & friends ask me if I ever sell my work and said they’d totally purchase it if I did! Also, as a donation, I printed, matted and framed some pieces for a benefit held by CTPPA to raise money for domestic violence victims, and my piece from the Outer Banks sold within the first hour! At these points I really had no intention of selling my photographs, but those bits of encouragement definitely help the Etsy idea come to fruition. And I have to say, I’m diggin the feeling of having them out there.
A few of my favorites are below! Only 8 of each image will be released for sale, so not everybody and their neighbor can have the same print on their wall. Once that image has been selected by 8 buyers, it will be retired and replaced with a new piece of work. Each will be printed on Fine Art paper as 12x18 prints, ready for mounting and framing. Some of them have been worked over in Photoshop in a "waterdrop/watercolor-esque" manner. I chose these images based on it's what I personally would hang in my own home, so the collection is pretty personal to me. Some of them I've added my favorite quotes to as options for customization. If you're interested in any of these and have questions regarding customization, please just ask!
So among all of these things, an always active Sam, and doing some big-time nesting (yes, it’s definitely a thing, and it's on) I’m really just trying to juggle my actively creative mind with “taking it easy” until she's here. My official due date is Nov 13, though a very likely side effect of the surgery is preterm delivery. While sticking with these doctors’ orders of light activity has been one of the most difficult challenges mentally, I've physically been carrying a 38wk size belly since 16wks (moms, I know you're feeling for me) so I just keep reminding myself that I’m doing the best I can with what I’ve got. And after one pregnancy loss last year and then losing one of the twins 10 weeks ago, I’ve finally started allowing myself to get excited for this baby girl’s arrival. I think I’ve finally stopped guarding my heart from the possibility of completely losing this pregnancy, and celebration mode has begun! I’ve got an amazing husband, little crazy lovable Sam, and the most supportive family and friends a girl can ask for. I absolutely LOVE what I do, I'll never stop shooting, and even though I won't be able to take sessions for a bit, the camera will never be far from my hand for long.
Wish me luck! -T